CHANGE

Words cannot describe this feeling inside
but I’ll try

You see I’ve tried to fill a void that CANNOT be filled by the world.
I cannot/will not satisfy what my flesh wants
There’s a war raging in my members
Yes, I get pulled side to side.
Except now the side of the Light is completely taking over
I found I have to lose myself to find myself
I must lose my life to save it
I have made a decision
A life changing decision
To follow “True” Love, to follow the Truth, to follow the Way, to follow the Life

I don’t know everything,
But I know what my soul wants.
I know what I need
I know my desire

I did not find God
He already knew me before I ever really knew HIM

He said He formed me in my mothers womb
And He said His thoughts for me are good
He promised He loves me with a everlasting love
He promised to never leave me nor forsake me

He wanted me even when I ran away
He loved/loves me every day

I don’t fully understand why He has chosen me
But all I know is that I want to walk His way

I NEVER had a plan.

I lived to party and to manipulate and hurt people

People were deceived and thought I was GOOD.
But little do they know, NO ONE IS GOOD, except for God

I used people
I hurt people
I was consumed with myself
I HATED MYSELF
I had no hope
I had no direction
I hurt myself
oh the destruction
I liked rebellion,
only because I didn’t KNOW True Love.
I rebelled to draw attention to myself,
by actions, by my clothing

Nobody ever really knew me, because I didn’t even know myself.

I’ve been bullied, I’ve been abused, I’ve been used.

None of us know what real love is UNTIL only until we know JESUS CHRIST.

So many mockers out there.
so many persecutors out there……………
they need to know His love

I’m laying down my comfort
I’m laying down my fears
I’m laying down my pain

Jesus I NEED YOU
Every single day I need you
I will not be ashamed
You have made me this way
I need you to take control of EVERYTHING
I am so weak and i’m not smart
I don’t care about wordly wisdom or getting a college degree

He took a harlot, a foul sinner and HE CLEANSED ME.

Yes, He made me clean.

I died.

He brought me to life.

living before wasn’t living.

I was a selfish, zombie

I cannot listen to what I used to, secular music irritates me.
I cannot watch t.v. because it’s all shenanigans.
I cannot shop till I drop because it brings me no joy
I cannot binge eat because its not fulfilling
I cannot partake in rude or profound discussions because I know it grieves my Father’s Spirit.

I want what my Father wants. Because His Spirit lives IN me!

I’m in this place of losing myself as I find myself.

I cannot stay quiet about Jesus.
Yes, I want to be even more bold with preaching Jesus, until the day He takes me HOME.

He plucked me from the fire.
He saved me from the pit.

darkness is below me
The Light surrounds me and is in me

As I walk through the desert I can “see” this change

I can sense it

We have to bare fruit. We must bare fruit.

If we do not change, what’s the point?

Jesus said to pick up our cross and follow HIM!

We have to CHANGE! We have to become who the Lord created us to be!

We have to let go of our own ambitions and do what HE is calling us to do.

His Way is waaaaaay better.

Follow the Way!

The love of Christ WILL change you.

If you ever walked away from the Way you never knew Him in the first place.

He is True Love in the purest form. The most Holy! He is Compassion! He is GOOD!

Even when we are lost we still somewhere in our hearts desire so deeply to be loved, to be cherished, to be protected. I don’t care how tough you think you are, Jesus Christ will melt your heart and you will CHANGE. Change is inevitable with Him.

Without Him we can never truly change because without Him we cannot truly get away from ourselves.

We easily deceive ourselves!

Jesus saves us from our body of DEATH!

Without Him we are……nothing good.

Only His goodness can live inside of us.

By His Son and His Spirit we are made new.

Let Him change you. You need to change.

Nobody is a good person.

Don’t fool yourself.

Examine your motives.

Let Him set fire to those dark places.

Let Him change YOU!